Mastectomy or not?

The decision to have a bilateral mastectomy was a relatively easy one. I was told by the breast screening people I would have to definitely have my right breast removed due to the size of the lump and that I could have a partial mastectomy on the left side. Enough to remove the lump and surrounding tissue.

That immediately brought up visions of having a very misshaped boob and I could not stand the thougt of that. So I decided if one had to go, then the other had to as well. In all honesty I wasn't too sad at having to lose them. I was reasonably large in that department and I often referred to them as being 'saggy bits of fat' hanging off my chest. Having said that, they had fed and nourished my two babies and that was probably the only emotional attachment I had to them.

I also decided I wanted to have reconstructive surgery immediately after the mastectomy. This meant it would all be over and done with and after a four or so week recovery period, I would return to work with my new, smaller, pert breasts and get on with it. How daft was I...Nothing turned out how I had perceived it in my mind.

The decision was basically made for me that I had to have implants. I had wanted to use the fat from my tummy as I had plenty of it...but my BMI was just slightly too high and the plastic surgeon felt it was risky for a number of reasons. It was a much longer surgery (up to 12 hours), a much longer recovery period, two wound sites to heal (gulp) and so on.  I was gutted! Ultimately I got to make the final decision, and ultimately I wanted to wake from the surgery to be with my husband and daughters for years to come. But I had really got my hopes up of having a tummy tuck as well as boob job and all for free!!!! I always joked that a bit of liposuction and other tucks here and there could surely be done at the same time!  I didn't want implants as to me, they were for vain women...women who volunteered to have breast reconstruction, so they had bigger and better boobs. A vanity thing...the fact that millions of women have probably had implants due to breast cancer did not occur to me - why would it? Because I wanted to go smaller, I did not have to have an expander in to stretch the muscles. This helped the decision greatly. At this point I need to say, I have been at my place of work for many years, they have always been wonderful to me and this was set to continue. Kept my boss in the loop of appointments, what was going to happen but I wanted it all done in the least amount of time and fuss so it would not interfere with my work. Having to have left the office to go to hospital regularly to have an expander pumped up (no idea how they do it) was not conjusive to my plan, so not having to do that was great!

I had been informed initially that from the date of being diagnosed, the NZ public health system allowed up to a window of six weeks where surgery would be done for breast cancer. That period of time would not be enough to makr any difference. I was diagnosed on 21 October 2015 and my surgery was done on 19 November 2015. Everyone I had dealt with from Breast Screen Aotearoa, at the very beginning to surgeons, hospital staff were wonderful and very supportive and I will be forever grateful.